It’s so hard to write a post when I’m seething with anger!  This whole “overexposed” question came about when a “friend” on Facebook posted a rather large “public” post about how unsafe we are to share our children’s pictures, families, daily lives, etc., on the web.  And that we should privatize, lockdown, basically create a prison around our Facebook and blogs.  OK….so then what’s the point of being on Facebook then?  Why not use email?  You want it private, right?  If you have no wall posts, there’s no “real” interaction and no “real” reason to even be on FB.  So?  I don’t get it.

Here’s a new term for the Facebook wall hiders, “FB Voyeur”.  Or how about this one, “Lurker”.  That’s what I used to call myself.  I used to read every blog known to man, about 7 years ago (when there weren’t so many) and read all kinds of forum posts on babies, since I had no idea what I was doing when my first was born. Back in the day, I would read a post and turn to my hubby and bitch up a storm.  He’d say, every time, “Then tell ‘em!!”  I never did.

Then, about a year ago.  I finally got some cajones.  From where, I don’t know.  Maybe the whole advent of Facebook, Twitter and bloggers like, Dooce, just brought me outta my shell.  But suddenly, I decided, to hell with this, I’m gonna talk back.  And guess what, it feels good!  But, it also exposes me to response.  It’s not a one-way street no more.

Back to this whole “the Internet predators are watching” hullabaloo.  OK, I admit, I am very free with my name, family pics, etc., on the Web.  Ken and I have PIE (this blog) and I have another based on raising my two beautiful, mixed race daughters called www.mixtkids.com.  I have a Facebook account with about 15 photo albums of my girls, hubby and myself, all of which are open to friends of friends, so basically anyone.  I tweet, have a computer consulting business, both of which, publish my name all over the WWW.  I’m on classmates.com, Identi.ca and LinkedIn.  So, yeah, if you want to Google my name, you’re bound to pull up me, my hubby and even my kids, pictures and all.

But here’s the deal.  My daughter was plastered all over the country on more than one occasion.  First time, was a complete shock!  We get a call, “Hey, we saw PJ on the cover of so and so magazine.” Ken and I look at each other, “Nah, that’s probably some kid that just looks like her.  Well…send us the magazine.”  Bam!  There it is.  The cute little picture PJ took at Kiddie Kandids.  Apparently, if you don’t check the “DO NOT share” button or enter any of their contests, you’re kids pics can be used for their marketing desire.  That’s right.  They sold my kid out and she got nothin’.

After that, we decided, F that.  You want to put my kid on a magazine, you can pay.  We got an agent.  So, PJ got a gig.  Gymboree.  Very cool and lots of fun.  Anyway, the spring ad goes national.  Bam!  Pics all over the country and in all the spring mailers.  But we didn’t think twice about that and I bet the same person who warned about kids pics on FB wouldn’t think twice about letting their kid get paid by, hmmmm, let’s say, The GAP.  Then The Gap would post pictures in all their upcoming Summer advertisements and everyone would be, “oooh, ahhhh, cool..”, wouldn’t they?  Ok, I know it’s not the same thing, but really, it’s still exposure and that picture could still spark some sadistic pedophile’s mind, right?

So, after all that, I asked myself.  Self, “Are you being careless?” (I know, I sound like Emeril LaGasse) Careless?  No!  Some things are still discreet and private, but in all honesty, PJ likes her picture on the web and they’re always tasteful (MJ don’t know any difference).  The time will come when I’ll have to get my kid’s permission to post (like I do any other person’s) and I will, but that’s not here yet.

What it boils down to is this, the world is ever changing technologically.  Basically, life is different today and it will be even more different tomorrow.  We do need to be careful, as we always have been and we do need to adjust.  But being careful is different than living in a bubble.  You should be weary of Internet predators, but also be weary of your kid’s friend’s parents, their teacher, even your pastor.  Be weary, but don’t forget, you gotta live also and so do your children.  One day, they’ll be 15 and on Facebook or MySpace and you better have taught them to have self respect and confidence, not just how to hit the “private” button.

I will never say never!  I will never say that my mind won’t change, because that would be blogger’s suicide.  But what I will say is that I will do my best to protect my kids on and off the information super highway.  And, I will assume the best in humanity, because I am the forever, optimist.  But, I am very prepared to kick some ass if someone wants to fuck with my family.  And you can take that to the bank, Mofo!

~ Renae